A Bit Of The Other

The WHO has advised people to be vigilant against the Swine Flu. The Who said they were familiar with the symptoms of dizziness and vomiting. Spokesperson Roger Daltry said he experienced similar effects on LSD in the late sixties.
Egypt has ordered a cull of all pigs, whilst Broadway and London’s West End have demanded an [...]

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Patients retained in hospital with Swine Flu have described the food as offal
Health officials now have the power to detain and disinfect people suspected of having swine flu.  These new disinfect laws could be extended to include all English migrants and motor cycle gangs.
Another explosion at an ATM last night. If caught the perpetrators face [...]

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Ten people being tested for Swine Flu in Queensland are being given a face mask and told to go home and play in the dirt. By popular demand Pauline Hanson has also been asked to wear a face mask even though she’s displaying no symptoms.

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Pirates have tried to attack an Aussie cruise ship but gave up when they heard rumours that Kamahl headed the nightime entertainment. Noone died on board the ship, not even of old age, which is highly unusual on a world cruise. The captain said the problem came from a typographical error in the brochure, when the “World Sunspots” tour became the “World Hotspots” tour, taking in Somalia, Middle East and North Korea.

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