A Bit Of The Other

(4 votes, average: 5 out of 5)

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Wayne Swan is to simplify the tax system by taking all your salary and giving you some back as pocket money each week, but only if you tidy your room and mow the lawn.

Residents of Sydney’s north shore say cables on the new broadband network should go underground. They’ve were going to ask for cables on the railway to be buried too, but they can’t figure out how that would work.

Women are getting shorter and fatter according to new research. Single men are advised to find someone quickly before the situation gets any worse.

NSW will adopt a zero tolerance appraoch to knife crime, with first offenders facing two years in jail just for having a knife. Residernts have been told they’re just going to have to get used to buttering their toast with a fork.

The International Energy Agency has said oil is getting harder to come by. For example, I had to queue at the petrol station on Eastern Road for 15 minutes the other day.

Kraft said they pulled iSnack 2.0 from the shelves when they discovered it wasn’t compatible with Windows 7.

China’s economy continues to grow faster than elsewhere. Economists believe this is because they haven’t figured out how to use Twitter yet.

Needle exchange programs are proving to be very successful in Australia. If a drug users saves up 20 needles they can exchange it for a bong.

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