A Bit Of The Other

Tony Abbott says the coalition’s migration policy is to bring in skilled workers, who can form his front bench. Radioactive waste will now be stored near Lucas Heights. Councils will issue residents with a yellow recycling bin, with the waste collected every Thursday. They are being urged not to mix their radioactive waste with paper, [...]

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NSW Labor says they will be more open, with factional infighting to be televised on Foxtel pay-per-view. Bob Hawke says the Labor party needs to get back to basics, before adding how he’d like to get back to basics with Kristina Keneally. “Let’s get down to basics” Barry O”Farrell’s microphone didn’t work properly, so we [...]

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China has introduced its own search engine. It’s exactly like Google except there’s nowhere for you to type in what you’d like to look for. Apple is working with record companies to improve the osund quality on iTunes. The first step has been to remove anything by Justin Bieber. Barry O’Farrell has been criticised for [...]

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Cyclone Yasi has been downgraded to a category 3 cyclone – still capable of causing damage but with insufficient power to lift off Bob Katter’s hat. Insurance companies are installing chapels in their workplaces, holding mass each week and claim from now on, as far as they’re concerned, everything is an act of God.

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Bad news. Dame Joan Sutherland is dead. Worse news, some other people are still singing opera. Chilean miners have agreed to come out of the mine shift having been told David Koch won’t be there trying to hug them.

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